Milton and the $5 lamp

It really ties the room together

So I'm on my way to my buddies fishing tournament yesterday listening to the Racer X podcast, drinking a gnarly mug of fog cutter coffee and just generally enjoying life, when I spot a sweet floor lamp at a grange hall yard sale. I've been looking for an old iron floor lamp for a while and this one looked pretty cool, from 50 feet away and 30 miles per hour. So, In keeping with yard sale etiquette, I hammer the E-brake on the "150", pitching the truck sideways into a sweet tire smoking slide and come to rest next to the curb Ace Ventura style. I hop out ready to do some serious haggling at my first yard sale of the season. I walk up to the hall giving the good morning shake to some of the old timers setting up for the day when I see Milt. I didn't remember his name at first, but after talking to him for a second and asking him if we'd met before, I remembered where I had seen him. Milt's the neighbor of my buddy, Phil, who's tournament I was heading to. And just about the coolest guy you'd ever want to meet.  With that figured out, I asked him if he was fishing the tourney today. "Nope, helping out with the sale today. But I'll be over for the barbecue later." All said with that cool, been there done that, don't really give two shits attitude that only the real Maine old timers can seem to pull off. "Nice man, hope to see you there. How much for this floor lamp over here?" I ask.
For the sake of realism I'll format this like an interview from here on out.
Milt: Five bucks.
Me: Done, Ill take it. (No haggling needed. Running into Milt and getting a sweet floor lamp was well worth five bucks.)
Milt: Can't sell it to ya yet. Not 'till eight o clock.
Me: Huh? (I check my phone. It's 7:30) Uh, why not?
Milt: The ladies won't let me. (If you know, or don't know how these things work. "The ladies" he's referring to are the old timers' wives who organize all the events. The yard sales, bean suppers etc. And you DON'T mess with them or you will get the hairy eyeball).
 Me: well I'm already running late and I probably won't get back here before you're wrapped up. Is there any way we can make this work?
Milt: I'll buy it for you and bring it to the barbecue later.
Me: Great Milt, thanks.
Milt: Uh, I don't have 5 bucks on me.
Me: I'll give you the 5 bucks. (Now we've come full circle and I'm back to not getting the lamp without waiting around for half an hour.)
Without a word Milt looks around for the "ladies". With all of them being inside, he  picks up the lamp and starts walking towards my truck across the street. So I follow him feeling like I've been dropped into the Western Maine version of the yard sale Twilight zone. At this point we're both checking over our shoulders for the "Ladies", hoping we both get away with what's turning out to be the best and hardest to purchase lamp in the Northeast. We make it to the other side of the street without incident, and proceed with the transaction.
Me: They don't mess around Huh?
Milt: You have no idea.
Not wanting to get Milt(or myself) in trouble I put the lamp in the back of the truck as craftily as I can. With the lamp in  the bed and under cover I give Milt, what, in the end, turns out to be the best 5 bucks I think I've ever spent on anything. I thank him for his trouble and tell him I hope to see him at the derby. The derby was a good time. Everyone caught fish, ate dogs and burgers and talked some serious smack. But without a doubt, the highlight of the day was buying what I now consider Milt's floor lamp. Thanks for reading.

Going barbless

After some minor surgery this guy was released back in the river

The amount of fish we catch at the river borders on the ridiculous. Sure you get the odd session when you're just scratching double digits but those are the exception rather than the rule. We started fishing plastics (tubes, crawfish, senko worms etc.) pretty heavily this year and saw our fish counts nearly double. The downside to fishing these baits versus spinners and crankbaits has been that the fish take in the bait deeper, resulting in more injuries to the fish. The smallie pictured took a tube pretty deep requiring some minor surgery with some side cutters to safely clip and remove the hook.  I started crimping the barbs on all my hooks a few sessions ago and it's definitely made the fishing more challenging. Yeah, you do lose a few more fish. triggering more than a few choice four letter words to be dropped on the river. But it does make you a better fisherman. The second you hook up you pay a whole lot more attention to line tension and the angle of the rod in relation to what the fish is doing. By nature, small mouth bass are super quick and don't need an excuse to launch 2-3'out of the water to try to shake a bait. Going barbless has added more challenge to the fishing and resulted in less injuries to the fish. Win win, right? Thanks for reading.

100 fish morning

Pumpkinseed tubes were the bait of the day

Phil with his personal best smallie 3.1lbs and 19"

I love bringing people to the river for the first time. I talk it up enough that it probably sounds like one fish story after another. After a year or so of throwing the offer out  to my good buddy, Phil, to join me for some smallmouth fishing. Everything came together last Friday. We met at 6:30 am at the downriver boat ramp, loaded the boats into one vehicle and drove the 4 miles upriver to the launch. After a few minutes of roadside tackle-rigging and unloading boats, we were off. I hooked Phil and his son Johnathan up with my "go to" spinner for the river, knowing that it usually produces a fair amount of fish. For whatever reason, it wasn't. For any other spot, the 8 or so fish we caught in the first hour would have been pretty good. Not for the river. I started going through a few different baits with limited success until I put on a pumpkinseed tube. Anyone that fishes knows when you hit on the correct bait for that particular day the fishing can jump to a whole new level. The eddy that I had been fishing, and getting skunked in for the last 15 minutes, produced 10 nice smallmouth in the following 15 minutes! I told Phil and his son what I was using and it was game on for the rest of the day! Double and triple hook ups were normal for the rest of the morning. As was a whole lot of ear to ear grins! Phil told me right after he caught the lunker pictured that this was without a doubt the best smallmouth fishing he had ever seen. For the next few hours the fish count went up so fast that Phil and his son quit counting. I was into the morning for 40 and there were times when both Phil and Johnathan were pulling them into the canoe a whole lot faster than I was. Now, numbers don't matter. The fun you have with your buds outdoors in a beautiful environment is what it's really all about. That being said the final number, and this is a conservative estimate, was around 100 fish between the 3 of us. Not bad for a morning on the river. Thanks for reading!

River smallies with the fly rod. Good times!

I got away from fly fishing for a bout a year up until a recent canoe trip. 4 days spin casting out of a canoe and you start looking for something different.I'm not complaining about fishing and never will. I'm just saying changing things up can be fun. And when you're playing these hyper and super fun fish to catch on a fly rod, well, changing things up can be a ridiculous amount of fun!

A little something for the moto heads!

Nantucket sleigh ride (Maine style)

36" TDT rulers are usually enough!

I usually don't fish expressly for Northern Pike and up until last year hadn't caught one of these eating machines. The section of the Androscoggin River that I typically fish for smallmouth is known to contain a few of these submarines in the 7lb and up range. Until this session the largest pike I had boated was 25" and about 4lbs. Both of those measurements would change by a few digits at the end of this particular session. This day on the river was about average and by average I mean ridiculous amounts of fun. Beautiful 70+ degree temps, bluebird skies, and about a dozen smallies in the previous 2 hours. I was paddling back to the boat ramp when I remembered an old timer telling me that he had seen some "decent sized pike" in a shallow weed bed a few hundred yards North of the boat ramp. Seeing as my "schedule" was somewhat open for the next couple hours I figured I'd sling a couple spinners and see what might be hiding in the weeds. It hit on the second cast. Now compared to the smallmouth that I'd been catching, hit doesn't quite describe it. It felt like I snagged onto the bumper of a truck with an inebriated driver, a horrible sense of direction and a love of doing donuts. He took line! Lots of it! My drag had been set for the 1-2 lb smallies I typically catch at the river so when this torpedo took my spinner it was like dropping the gate on a supercross main! Let's do this! After the initial hit and line strippage, I settled into what I figured would be maybe a minute or two of back and forth and a nice pike in the boat. Then he started towing me around the cove and I realized he might be a little bigger then I had originally thought. I couldn't, and didn't see him for at least ten minutes. The water in the Andro this time of year looks like chocolate milk because of all the run off from different tributaries. It doesn't really clear up much until the summer when the rains slow down and the flow drops off some. So he starts towing me around in my 13.5' kayak. At first I'm cracking up until I realize he's towing me towards a downed tree about 40' away. If there's cover nearby, fish will try to get to it and he was heading straight for a potential line snapper of a submerged maple tree. As he's pulling, I'm holding onto the fishing pole with my right hand and trying to paddle/steer the kayak away from the tree with the left. After nearly ten minutes of this his pace slowed and I was able to  get him up alongside the boat and he gave me another surprise. He surfaced then dove, and as he dove I saw my spinner hooked right in front of his tail! He was literally pulling me around! After talking to a buddy of mine after the fact, I found out that if a pike misses a bait fish or lure, they may slap at it with their tail to try and stun their prey. Knowing the sketchy hook placement, I loosened up my drag a bit more and continued to play him less aggressively, letting him take line and not hurrying him to the boat. After about 5 more minutes he seemed to tire enough for me to bring him up alongside the kayak. His tail came out of the water first with the embedded lure right at the front of it. As quickly as I could, I grabbed the tail with my left hand, avoiding the lure, dropped my pole, and yanked the biggest pike I'd seen in person up into the boat. I didn't realize just how big he was until he landed in the right hand leg well of my kayak. He took up the whole thing! I paddled the 50 yards back to the boat ramp in complete disbelief. A couple back at the ramp was nice enough to take a few pics for me. And another fisherman who had also just come in from the river asked me if I wanted to weigh him. Commenting that he looked to be in the "8lb or so range." We hooked the scale to him and were both shocked when it settled on 15 lbs even! Outweighing the largest freshwater fish I've caught to date by about 10 lbs! And at 38"(measured on an adhesive,  customizable thatdangthing.com fish ruler) it was a solid foot longer than any pike I had previously caught. It was an amazing end to another great day on the river! Oh, and I just relined my poles with 25lb test and dug out my steel leaders. You know I'm going sub hunting again! Thanks for reading!

Slaying the smallies at a super secret spot in Northern Maine

A fun session at Higgins beach Maine

THE TDTOP 5

5 - Slingin'lures and boatin' smallies. The complete lack of precipitation in Maine for both the winter and early spring has resulted in summer like water levels in my river and better than average April fishing.
 4 - Jason Silva on the Joe Rogan podcast. One hour into this podcast and you're questioning whether or not we're in a real life Matrix. Or are we? I can't do it Justice. It's the 3/13/12 episode.
3 - Andrew Short getting his first supercross win! Yeah Shorty! It was one of the highlights of a supercross  season that's seen virtually every big name rider, including Shorty, out with injury. Nice to see one of the good guys finish first.
2 - Red Fang, "Wires". I'm ripping this off from a FB post today. Thanks Eric. Just when you thought the whole music video medium was dead, Red Fang delivers this master piece! Milk Jugs and the family truckster? Are you kidding me Clark?

1 - What's going to follow that?

Smallies like watermelon!

Bex first Pike!

15" smallie caught on white speckle tube

Watermelon tubes that is! I've been reading up on the early season habits of river small mouth and the general consensus is to fish bright plastics like a tube or craw fish with a somewhat slower then normal retrieve. After some trial and error with tube color and retrieve speed and technique, the fish definitely responded to a slow retrieve with either a white or watermelon colored tube. My wife boated her first pike along with a few nice small mouth. Good times.

ACCIDENTAL FISHING!

The decision to fish Indian Pond in Northern Maine was a last minute one. My wife keeps her horse about 45 minutes away from the lake, at a long time friend's house. Through their relationship I've become friends with her husband Bob, an avid fisherman, snowmobiler and all around good guy. Bob had picked up a sweet Lund Alaskan fishing boat and was itching to take it on it's first run this year. It required about 30 seconds of arm twisting for me to get on board for the 2 hour trip North to Bingham. We rolled in, threw the fishing gear in the truck, made a pit stop for Fritos and chocolate bars (two of the four food groups) and pointed the truck to the south end of Indian pond.

Apparently all you need for the "hard to catch" brook trout.

We arrived at the lake greeted by bluebird skies, 60+ degree temps and a cranking 15 knot west wind. The west wind was warm but it was going to make fishing sketchy, most likely forcing us to find shelter on the west side or in some wind protected coves or inlets. For any of this to happen the boat was going to have to run, which was proving to be a  little bit of a problem . We dropped the boat  in the water, tossed our gear in, turned the key, and wuh! Nothing. An hour and a half, about 2 dozen four letter words, and one repaired battery connection later, we were on our way down the lake. We hit up an inlet, where Bob had caught some nice native brookies in the past, to a whole lot less wind and zero success for the first hour or so. We threw just about anything we thought might work, and were just about to try another spot when Bob hooked up with a nice 10" brook trout. It's funny how one quick fish can erase an hour and a half of skunkage. With a fresh boost of adrenaline from getting a fish in the boat, we decided to head another 5 miles up the lake to a spot Bob thought might get us into some more brookies and possibly some smallmouth. We pulled into this unnamed spot, (go find it yourself if you want the goods) set the trolling motor on a heading and started slinging some spinners. About 10 minutes in I hooked up with a nice smallmouth that reminded me why I love catching this particular fish. Strong and fast fights with a whole lot of air time. We continued further up this inlet,(another clue?) without any success until we arrive at a beautiful spot with a little more current and a whole lot of potential. Bob had had quite a bit of success with smallies in this spot in the past by throwing a good size spinner bait. He hooked on a double bladed rig and started flipping it toward anything that looked like it might hold some hungry smallmouth. I was at the front of the boat doing the same when I heard a splash, followed by some choice 4 letter words. Bob's reel had snagged on a cast and the weight of the lure when it fetched up, ripped the pole out of his hands and sent it about 8' down to the bottom of the river bed. I saw what happened and before we moved off the spot and lost the pole for good, I took my spinner off and put on the biggest hook I could find and tried to snag his sunken fishing pole. I had gone back and forth a half dozen times when, SLAM my pole just about gets ripped out of my hands! I recovered from the initial shock and started fighting what I initially thought was a smallmouth. I started reeling  and caught a flash of silver. Not a bass? Reeled a little more. Trout! Reeled a little more and got him a little closer. Big brook trout! I yard him up into the boat just as he shakes the baitless, weighted, fishing pole dredging hook I had on and lands in the boat. Bob and I look at each other in disbelief and just start laughing like crazy, taking pictures and just enjoying the hell out of one of the wierder fishing moments either of us had ever experienced.

THE TDTOP FIVE (WAY LATE)

5 - K-Dub surviving one of the dirtiest crashes I've seen him take in his supercross career. Dub was killing in his heat race against a much younger and supposedly faster James Stewart,when he caught his foot scrubbing a triple and proceeded to whiskey throttle a 70' jump, go over the bars, get drilled by both his bike and planet earth, then gets up under his own power to get off the track . If you're not a fan of Kevin Windham you clearly have issues.
4 - The intro riff to Seek And Destroy. I'm ripping this off from a FB post from a good buddy of mine. Thanks Head for getting that riff stuck in my head for the better part of a week. Raise the horns \m/ \m/ !
3 - Working on the fishing kayak.  I've got plans and they involve cordless drills, shock cord(not what you might think), stainless hardware, and a massive cup of coffee.
2 - Actually learning how to fish smarter. I read  an article from the In Fisherman the other day about early season, cold water Bass fishing. As I'm reading all the tips on choices of baits/lures, time of day, phases of moon(no bullshit, they claim this matters) I'm getting more stoked on all of this knowledge I'm going to apply to my fishing. I come to the end of the article and the closing statement is basically "of course fish being fish, none of this may work, so just throw whatever you've got in the boat and see what happens!" Gee, thanks guys.

1 - Working on some product! I appreciate all the; what is it? When is it? Oh that's what it is?! Questions about the company. I'm working on it, believe me. Getting this company going has been  a fun and time consuming process and I have a lot of people to thank so far. Thanks to Holly at Mailings unlimited for the graphic design work, you killed it! There are way too many options (I didn't know some of these colors existed) in a graphic design program for someone with my attention span to deal with. Thanks for putting up with me. If anyone needs direct mail/marketing help with their company you won't find a better group of people than the crew at Mailings Unlimited.

RIDICULOUS AMOUNT OF FUN FLYING WITH MY OLD MAN

NEW TDT TEES ARE IN AND THE SECOND FREE TEE SHIRT CONTEST IS ON!

This one is easy. More movie trivia because I'm a big movie geek. What 80's movie, that was probably shown at least 6 times a day when cable came out, starred Dennis Quaid and Ringo Starr and basically had no understandable dialogue? Bonus question for a TDT hat:This one is for my Maynard homies. What local establishment had a letter fall off their sign resulting in it being called something else, for, well, ever?

The rules - No search engines! Pull this from the cob webs of your 80's hairspray and arena rock riddled brains. If you're too young, ask someone older. We all like talking about the 80's.

No family - Let's be honest, you guys are getting swag already.

You don't have to know both answers. Obviously if you're not from Maynard (you unfortunate souls) you won't know the bonus question.

The first post on the BLOG site gets the shirt and/or hat.

THE TDTOP 5 OF THE WEEK

5 -  Your moms house podcast -Tom Segura and Kristina Pazinski kill it on this podcast. Two of the best at taking any topic and bringing it places it probably never would or should have gone.
4 - The new Lorax movie - Don't care how old you are check it out. IN 3D!! Dr. Seuss was made for the third (and possibly fourth) dimension.
3 - Something about a truck- Kip Moore. Great bluesyish country song. The more you hear it the redder your neck gets! Don't judge, just listen.
2 - Weeds - I motored through the first 5 episodes last night waiting for the New Nitro Circus TV show to come on. One of the most conversational and cleverly written shows on TV.

1 - Nitro Circus Live on MTV2 - Any time Travis, Tommy, Special Greg and the crew start hucking themselves off a mega ramp I will be parked in front of the idiot box waiting to see what they snap in half. If MTV isn't going to play music any more they should turn the channel over to Travis full time, give him a giant stack of cash, and let him do his thing.

80 Degrees and Paddling in March!

8

80 DEGREES AND SKUNKED

The first fishing outing of the year resulted in a big goose egg. I honestly didn't care. While I'm sure the polar ice caps lost some serious frontage over the last warm spell, I'll take the 80 degree temps and summer paddling conditions. The smallies that I was hunting were less than active but it was pretty sweet to get out and start hunting for them again, regardless of the outcome. Temps are supposed to drop overnight and a buddy and I are going to hit another spot on Saturday.

THE TDTOP 5 OF THE WEEK

5 - Zeppelin. Because, well, it's Zeppelin.
4 - Doing wheelies on the mountain bike. Yup, doing wheelies, because they are wicked fun.
3 - Jim Gaffigan on the Joe Rogan podcast this week. Two of the best comics out there just BSing.
2 - Blake Wharton winning the Indy round of the lites east Supercross. This kid rocks the Slash Fro, minus the top hat, and has one of the smoothest styles out there.
1 - Nothing earth shattering for number 1. How could it not be the 80 degree weather we've been having for the last few days here in Maine?

RIGGING THE YAK WITH AN ANCHOR TROLLEY FOR MY FIRST GO OUT THIS WEEKEND.

SHOPPING FOR ACTION CAMS TODAY

Heading down to L.L. Beans to do some action cam shopping today. My wife and I are heading to the Loaf tomorrow for some goggle tan and spring condition snowboarding. It looks like it's going to be bluebird skies and 64 degrees. Possible video (probably unwatchable and poorly edited) to follow.

OLD FRIENDS AND NEW COMPANIES

Thanks HEEEEEEEAD!

Thatdangthing New Art!

New Art from TDT! Look for it on mousepads, teeshirts, beer coozies, and fish rulers soon!

FRESH TRACKS AND ORANGE PIE PLATES

My buddy Chris and I got an unusually late start on the hill yesterday. Usually we're on the road and drinking coffee while it's still dark out, especially if there's some fresh to be had. There was some debate as to which form of water we were going to play in. Frozen or liquid? The buoy's were 13' and cranking and the snow reports were at a solid 12"+. After some debate we both figured  sliding down hill on some fresh pow was a better choice than taking 13'waves and 40 degree water on the squash. Fast forward an hour and a half ride and one stop at an Irving later, we roll up to Mt Abrams to see a quarter full parking lot and some deep looking pow carves on the hill. For anyone that skis or snowboards you understand the adrenaline you get just knowing what's on the hill waiting for you to play in. It's our Christmas, New Years and birthday all rolled into one. It just doesn't get any better. We gear up and make a run to warm up the legs, hitting some fresh on the edges and scoping out the woods for some stashes of untracked goodness. The second run in we find an opening at the edge of the trail and drop in for some fresh tracks and a whole lot of bush wacking. Most of the stuff we ride isn't "gladed" or thinned out woods. All the dead wood and small willy wack trees are still there and waiting to hook a ski or snowboard tip. If you're a skier and you're unfortunate enough to get your ski's on either side of one of these 4' trees it'll remind you why we call these little saplings the "willy wacks"! Painful if you're the skier. Hilarious if you're the skier's buddy listening to him get abused by a juvenile maple tree. After many bomb runs and more pow turns than we could handle we both spot a potential stash of fresh that looks better than anything we've hit so far. There's only one draw back, it's "out of bounds". Normally I have no problem ducking "the orange rope" or the equally scary "plastic pie plate on a stick" ski areas like to use to deter you from scoring a few turns, but some times the ropes there for a reason. You can get in trouble pretty quick by ducking the rope and ending up in waist deep snow a few hundred yards off trail. It usually results in 20 minutes of post-holing your way out of the woods while sweating through, and cursing all that moisture wicking long underwear you were praising 30 minutes before for keeping you so warm. We did the smart thing (for once) and took a run next to the potential stash checking to see if it ran out next to a lift or on to a trail below. It did and it was on for the next run. One chair lift ride later and we both drop off the trail and past the impenetrable pie plate barrier to score one of the longest untracked pow runs either of us has ever had. We popped out on to the trail at the bottom grinning like idiot's. Needless to say we rode the section for the rest of the day by ourselves scoring possibly the best hour and a half of snowboarding I've ever had on the east coast. Thanks for reading.

LINED UP AND CONVERSATING

It had been about two weeks since my last surf session so when I checked the online report and the buoy's read 3.9'@ 4-6 seconds with a south west wind I figured it was worth a go out. To all the non surfing folks out there those wind and swell measurements on a sunny 50 degree day in February translate to 2 hours in the water and a whole lot of fun. When you get a day like that smack in the middle of winter in Maine there's good vibes all around. Dogs are getting walked, kids are running around and just about everyone is walking around with that dopey, good weather perma grin plastered on their face. I suited up and paddled out and immediately caught a couple of fun little zippers. It was during a lull when a dude on a paddle board came out settling just off to my left in the line up . I said hi and commented on the stand up paddle  board he was riding as it was a little different than the usual size and shape that you see out on the water. I asked how it surfed and he replied,"I don't know, I just finished building it and this is my first time out". Nice man, "first paddle board ?" I ask. "No, first board ever!" We proceed to talk boards and shape for the next few minutes while alternately catching waves. Conversations in the line up are usually pretty broken by nature. You'll be in the middle of a full on conversation about the last movie you watched when a set rolls through and one or both of you catch the wave, ride it in, paddle back out and resume the chat you were having like nothing happened. Some of the most interesting and memorable conversations are often broken up by 5-10 seconds of surfing, which in turn makes the conversations that much more memorable. Just talking to this guy who designed, built and surfed his own board was pretty inspiring. One more broken conversation and one more session where I left the ocean more relaxed and stoked than I went in. Thanks for reading.

VIENNA SAUSAGE, OPEN WATER AND AL GORE'S INTERNET

Not only did big Al single handedly create the internet he also created global warming; thereby extending my fishing season exponentially. I may have gotten my facts wrong in that opening statement (I actually created the internet, you're welcome) but what IS a fact is, if the weather keeps doing what it's doing, ice fishing will become a thing of the past. I'm not a huge fan of drilling holes in the ice and waiting for that flag to tip but it beats sitting home watching golf on the idiot box and finding reasons not to paint the master bathroom walls. Just a random example by the way, egg shell white exists for a reason. For me ice fishing exists solely for the excuse to go outside, hang with your friends, and cook some deceased animal over a fire. No matter what you're eating, it always tastes twice as good cooked outdoors. Vienna sausage? Fire it up! Spam? You put enough mustard on it and you'd swear you're eating a flattened hot dog. And don't forget the pinnacle of pulverized animal byproducts, the polska kielbasa (no mustard required, although appreciated). Anyone of these delights cooked over a camp stove or even better, a sterno flame, you're in ice fishing heaven. All the open water this time of year has got me fired up to drag the kayak out of the basement, reline the fishing poles, and oh, wait, forget all that I just watched the weather and it's going to be 12 tomorrow. Get a pack of ball parks, some shiners and just a hint of ambition and let's drill some holes. Thanks for reading.

TDT FREE T-SHIRT CONTEST (because, let's face it, no ones's gonna pay for one of these).

More shameless self promotion and  a completely unoriginal marketing idea from the folks at TDT. Alright, technically you need employees to be "folks" but I thought that might make it sound more legit. Here's the rules: I'm a huge (and freakishly tall movie geek). Come up with an alternative line or ad lib on to one of the most quoted lines from one of the best movies of all time JAWS. "We're gonna need a bigger boat". No disrespect to the late Roy Scheider , and I don't think you can improve on perfection but give it a shot. As far as the rules go, be creative. And obviously spelling doesn't count (it clearly doesn't on this blog). The contest? will be open until 6:00 pm this Friday and the winner will be judged by the folks at TDT (just me really) at 6:01 pm and will be notified within a certain amount of time. Said T-shirt will arrive at your doorstep shortly thereafter. After it goes through the mail etc.....

Not how you land from a triple.

As horrible as this looks both of these riders, Trey Canard on the #41 Honda and Ryan Morias on the #65 Yamaha are both predicted to make full recoveries.  When I first saw this my heart literally dropped. Anytime you see something like this it's awful but being a fan of this sport and knowing a little about these two riders in particular I couldn't have been more bummed. Ryan and Trey are two of the truly good guys in the sport of motocross. I know sports figures shouldn't be role models but I would have no problem with my kids looking up to these two polite and hard working gentlemen. They are both great spokesman and ambassadors for the sport I love and have been a fan of for the last 25+ years. If you've never seen a race, check one out and get to know the personalities a little bit. And when Trey and Ryan return I'll guarantee you'll be pulling for them. Get well soon boys. The next race airs on Sunday @12:00 on CBS.

You can't breathe through Denny's hash browns?

Motocross is my favorite sport. If we grew up together, we either watched, or road tripped to a motocross race at one time together. Those roadies have provided me with some of the best memories of my life. From blacking out the lights on a tour through the Howe cavern's in upstate New York (I can still hear my father telling us to quit it while he was trying not to laugh), to my buddy Hank turning beat red and nearly choking to death on a quadruple order of hash brown's at Denny's. Alright, I need to elaborate on the last one. Denny's hash brown's are the holy grail of breakfast sides as far as my boy Hank is concerned. Forget about the  Lumberjack or some Moons Over Mi-Hammy. Hank could care less about these breakfast staples. It's hash browns and lots of em' He's sitting, knife in one hand fork in the other, business ends of each pointing at the ceiling waiting for the waitress to take our order. My wife (girlfriend at the time) puts her order in, my buddy Steve  orders, then me. All the usual questions come from the waitress. What kind of toast? How would you like your eggs? etc... Then she gets to Hank. And for you? Four orders of hash browns! Dead silence and a somewhat funny/puzzled look comes across her face. That's four orders of hash brown's? Yup, Hank replies in a somewhat annoyed way. You really need to know Hank to fully appreciate this but I think you're starting to get the picture. All he cares about are his hash browns and how quickly they land in front of him. So, ordering is done, and yes we do make fun of him for both his order and the  determined and completely disturbing look in his eyes. The food arrives a short time later, although not nearly quick enough for the hash brown junkie sitting next to me and that's when it goes down. And by it I mean the savagery Hank unleashes on this poor pile of shredded potatoes. He lowers his head about 6 inches from the plate and mechanically starts shoveling this golden brown tater mound into his gullet. Now we're already staring in disbelief and cracking up when Hank's erratic breathing sucks an errant piece of spud down his windpipe. This is where the real comedy starts. He starts coughing. Everyone knows the "something went down the wrong pipe" cough, right? Well, it usually doesn't happen in front of three good friends and a packed Sunday morning breakfast crowd in Denny's. Some other tables start to notice what's happening while our buddy is coughing like he's got the plague and turning a completely unnatural shade of red/purple. The whole restaurant finally goes silent. Except for Hank's relentless coughing and his 3 "friends" who are turning the same shade of red/purple from being doubled over laughing at him. Hank eventually cleared his throat (no thanks to us) and finished every molecule of the quad hash brown order,  scarring any witnesses to this disturbing scene for life. I strayed off my original point from this blog being that motocross is my favorite sport. Now Looking back on this and the endless other stories that have come from this sport I love so much I know why. It's provided me with a life time of amazing experiences often times before the races even take place.

Hello! Buddy the Elf!

The idea for this product and the subsequent company that's growing out of it has been a constant source of fun and challenges to work through. Fun being the key word. Keep it ELF! Huh?  This was my response the first time my brother-in-law and fishing bud Paul dropped this anagram on me. If it's not EASY, LUCRATIVE and FUN why do it? Simple right? Yup. So, keeping ELF in mind, I've been making contacts and moving forward with getting thatdangthing/TDT off the ground. From ordering T-shirts. How many? What color? If you get 48 they're cheaper. To calling lawyers. What's the company? National? local? This is going to cost $$$$$$$$$!? Every phone call so far has resulted in talking to helpful, intelligent people and has raised twice as many questions as I had before I made the calls. So far the whole thing has been somewhat EASY and definitely FUN. This blog being the mostest, funnest part so far. As far as LUCRATIVE that's still up in the air. Thank you to everyone that's helped so far. And if anyone has any small business advice/comments/anecdotes keep them to yourself. Now that was FUN.(sarcasm) Thanks for reading.

Mountain biking to go surfing: The Braindead Bi-athalon

This surf session has been about 1 year in the making. There's a spot that we've been checking for the last year or so that only works on the right size swell with the proper direction and enough size to make it break properly. Even the name of the spot is cool, "Hydraulics". Just sounds like some waters moving when you say it. After the checking of buoys and forecasts and a phone call from my buddy, Chris, it was shaping up to come together for this fickle spot to really line up and start firing. Here's where the mountain bikes come in. The easiest access to the water for this spot is through a private yacht club sailboat launch. And the only hassle free place to park is in a town beach lot about a mile away, enter the bikes. We roll up and check the surf to see, hell yeah, it was clean and peeling! Next step is to ditch the boards over the guardrail and bring the trucks down to the beach lot and suit up. Hop on the bikes, pedal the mile back to the yacht club, ditch the bikes behind the yacht club storage shed and jump in the water. The day was already a classic before we caught the first wave. And yeah, we scored.

Try #2: Happy New Year!

Another year in the books. Fish were caught and ducks were shot. And awful rhymes were used to start blog posts. I guess technically that happened this year. I'm not big on New Years resolutions but I'm resolving to try to be less hackey in my next post. 2011 was a great year despite all the craziness going on in the world around us. Forget about the economic downturn, just save up stacks of cash to purchase any and all product that my company produces in 2012. Consider this my contribution to the sluggish economy. Stimulus shmimulus, just buy some stuff. Preferably from me. Bold? maybe. Obnoxious? Absolutely! Don't need an adhesive, customizable, fishing ruler/sticker? Don't fish? Doesn't matter. Maybe you'll start one day and won't you feel silly that you can't measure that lunker you just caught? This type of marketing is called "transparency" and I'm thinking it's the way to go for  for the new year. Unless it isn't. In which case I'm completely out of ideas and should probably hire an actual marketing company. I'm fired up for the year and whatever kind of trouble thatdangthing/TDT gets me into. Happy New Years everyone and buy my stuff.

The Bill Murray wave/pizza blog post.

Do you go out or don't you? Easy call right? If there's surf, you surf! Unless you've been surfing for a long time and you turn into a jaded wave snob. Here's an analogy for you. Someone asks you if you want a pizza but it's plain and it looks like someone kicked it down the street, like  in the opening scene in stripes. You'll probably still go for it but you may not enjoy it as much as that Bacon, extra bacon and bacon pizza from the local artery constricting pizza joint.  Point being, bad pizza is better than no pizza and garbage waves are better than no waves. Check your attitude and just go out. Jaded usually  doesn't play well in any aspect of life. Just ask John Winger.

Happy day after New Years!

HAPPY NEW YEARS DANG IT!

Another year in the books. Fish were caught and ducks were shot. And awful rhymes were used to start blog posts. I guess technically that happened this year. I'm not big on New Years resolutions but I'm resolving to try to be less hackey in my next post. 2011 was a great year despite all the craziness going on in the world around us. Forget about the economic downturn, just save up stacks of cash to purchase any and all product that my company produces in 2012. Consider this my contribution to the sluggish economy. Stimulus shmimulus, just buy some stuff. Preferably from me. Bold? maybe. Obnoxious? Absolutely! Don't need an adhesive, customizable, fishing ruler/sticker? Don't fish? Doesn't matter. Maybe you'll start one day and won't you feel silly that you can't measure that lunker you just caught? This type of marketing is called "transparency" and I'm thinking it's the way to go for  for the new year. Unless it isn't. In which case I'm completely out of ideas and should probably hire an actual marketing company. I'm fired up for the year and whatever kind of trouble thatdangthing/TDT gets me into. Happy New Years everyone and buy my stuff.